Wednesday, July 5, 2017

You Don't Know Me!

By Ken Dam, Ontario Representative

“Those tests are all BS,” exclaimed my good friend. “They categorize your personality into a narrow box that is way too rigid. And besides, you can just manipulate your answers to get the result you want.”

So began hours of conversation, over a few cold ones, while sitting in a comfy screened-in porch along the Muskoka River near Bracebridge, Ontario.

Over this past Canada Day weekend, my wife and I headed north with four other couples—and the rest of Ontario it seemed, judging by the traffic. With fireworks exploding in the distance, we had our own conversational fireworks, debating the pros and cons of personality tests.

There are many such tests out there, including the Myers Briggs, True Colours (which many CLAC stewards have undergone at stewards conferences), DISC, and more. In our case, we disputed the merits of the Enneagram, a personality profiler that distinguishes between nine distinct personality types. While everyone has bit of each type in them, each person has a basic personality type they identify with most. That’s their dominant personality.

Over the course of the weekend, all 10 of us completed a free online test to determine our dominant personality type. As we discussed the results it became particularly interesting to examine how we related to one another, especially when we were angry. Each type tends to respond to stress and conflict in different ways, and it was almost uncanny how accurate the results were. We witnessed that Type Fours become more emotionally volatile and demanding, while Type Nines become disengaged and impossible to get through to. Then there’s Type Sevens, who might impulsively say whatever comes into their mind—even if it’s extremely biting!

While many people might resist the notion of being categorized or “put into a box” as my friend put it, the truth is we all have behaviour and thought patterns that we repeat, often without thought or self-reflection.

As for me, the more I examined the description of my dominant personality, the more comforting it became. It was as if someone was writing specifically about me and my inner workings. “How did they know I do that? That’s crazy, that’s exactly what I do!”

Within each of the nine types, there are encouragements to grow. Type Nines should work on finding their own voice while Type Twos should resist the urge to be people pleasing, and so on. And this is where I found the Enneagram to be so helpful. Knowing who you are is an essential first step in being able to grow as a person. Your area of growth will likely be completely different than your spouse’s, your co-worker’s, and your boss’s.

I am convinced that personality profiling tests, such as the Enneagram, can be important tools to help us grow. And while my friend still doesn’t agree, it isn’t so bad to be known as a type. And besides, he’s Type One, and they classically resist categorization.

You Don't Know Me!

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