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Friday, January 17, 2025

Facing Hard Things Head On

“I know now that I will become weaker at what I avoid, that what I run towards will strengthen in me.”

By Sue Siemens, Regional Director, Cambridge Member Centre

One of the best books I read in 2024 was Run Towards the Danger: Confrontations with a Body of Memory by Sarah Polley.

In her book, Polley shares about a serious concussion she suffered and her long and difficult recovery from it. She eventually seeks treatment from a doctor who completely subverts the well-known concussion treatment plan of decreasing light, noise, and screen use with lots of rest.

Instead, this doctor tells her to “run towards the danger,” and it changed the course of her recovery. To heal her brain and retrain it to be strong and resilient, she had to lean into the noise, the light, daily activities, routine, and exercise, even though her body was telling her not to, that it was all too hard.

I’m no scientist, so please don’t use this short summary of a compelling metaphor as a treatment plan for what ails you. But I have found myself repeating “run towards the danger” over and over again to myself, and even to loved ones experiencing hard things.

While I’m a fan of good health, boundaries, work-life balance, etc., I’m also aware that as a society we’ve possibly become so overindoctrinated in self-care culture that we may be at risk of forgetting that it’s also important to do hard things. I’m learning in my own life, and through watching others around me experiencing profound pain that they can’t run from, that it’s often in the hard—and even painful things—where growth and transformation happens.

Should I have that difficult conversation with a coworker? Run towards the danger.

Should I push through physical fatigue and pain for those last few kilometres? Run towards the danger.

Should I share how I’m really feeling even though it feels vulnerable? Run towards the danger.

Should I reach out to that family member I’ve been avoiding?

You get the picture. It doesn’t universally apply, of course, and oftentimes our spirit and bodies do know best, and we should pay attention. And (personally speaking) I’ve become pretty good at choosing rest, boundaries, and self-care as a way out of avoiding difficult things.

And so, I’ve been practicing discerning the moments where I should run towards the danger and be open to the growth and transformation that can happen when we face hard things head on.

As Polley writes, “I know now that I will become weaker at what I avoid, that what I run towards will strengthen in me. I know to listen to my body, but not so much that I convince myself I can’t do things or that I can’t push myself.”